This is the stuff

You would think that 2 stomach bugs in 2 weeks would do me in. I have spent the past few days taking care of 2 of my sweet kids who got a less violent case of the stomach bug AGAIN! Instead of complaining about this happening, I can honestly say, I have spent a lot of time over the past few days thanking God that I am taking care of my vomiting children because all they have is a stomach bug. I'm not trying to be Polly Positive by seeing the glass half full, I'm being honest! I have friends and aquaintences who have spent weeks, months or even years at a time with their children as they threw up regularly because of chemo or some other drug to fight a cancer attacking their little bodies.  I know a family right now whose 6 year old is battling cancer. I have a friend whose son had surgery yesterday...on his brain.  So while stomach bugs are no fun. And cleaning up vomit and changing yucky diaper after yucky diaper can weigh you down a bit, I am so thankful that it isn't worse! 

I am reminded of a quote by Anne Voskamp, "Until we call attention to the moments of our lives, we miss our lives."

This is my life! And I wouldn't have it any other way!

I

My sweet Jaxon. Who probably caught the bug from Joss! He loves her SO much and just wanted to help her feel better when she wasn't feeling well!

Sweet Joss. Still sleeping at 10am. That doesn't happen. Just a minor clue she was a sickie!

Spring Visit

We love visiting Grandma an Papa in Durham.  The kids are spoiled even more than they are already!  If you think grandparents never say no, you can imagine that GREAT grandparents go over and above!  I mean, these kids get oreos whenever they want them from Grandma Ruth!  And Papa lets them sit ON the pool table to roll the balls in!  I'm not so sure they did that when I was little!  The love is just busting from the seams at their house!

They are precious in HIS sight

Ok, I don't know if I have the words to blog about this. It has been on my heart and after reading 2 other blog posts by adoptive moms who say it so well, I may just have to give you the links and let you read their beautiful words so you can get the jist of it. Or try anyway. Because unless you have adopted a child of another race, or ARE of another race yourself. You really won't understand. Please don't take this the wrong way. I am not in any way trying to sound ugly. I'm just trying to be honest.

I will start by saying I have said things in the past like "I don't see color". Ok, by that, I meant I don't discriminate. I, thank God, was brought up in a racially diverse area with parents who were by no means prejudice. That's all well and good BUT, the difference is there. One of my best friends and I have had discussions regarding the differences between African American and Caucasian people and I never fully understood the things she said to me. I understood to the best of my ability... as a white woman with a white husband and white children.

Pause for just a moment....I need to say this publically...

Tamara, I am SO sorry. I must have sounded just like everyone else! I'm sure I sounded uber naive! While I will never "get" it the way YOU "get" it, I get it way more than I ever thought I did!

Enter Jossalyn. As a white mom, I didn't really realize the subtle discriminations that are really everywhere. For example, I went to get the kids books at Lifeway for Easter and had a very hard time finding a book with a brown child in it. I did find one, mind you, but it wasn't easy. As for dolls, good luck with that! You better grab one while you see it because there are no where near as many brown dolls as white ones! Take magazine ads, other than a few companies who are very good about having racially diverse as well as portraying handicapped children in their line, it is slim pickin's to see a cute little brown girl sportin' these top of the line clothes! Why? I wish I could answer that question! While this world has come a long way in equality and discrimination, there is such a long ways to go. It. breaks. my. heart.

I think of things I never would have thought before. I wonder things I never would have wondered before. Do these little girls and boys see the differences? I don't know. I can only pray that I can do the best job possible in raising ALL of my children so they can deal with situations that are sure to arise. Conversations that are going to occur, to the best of their ability, in a manner that will be pleasing to the Lord.

I pray that those of you who read this will not take it the wrong way. I may have. Before I had a brown daughter. It's just the reality of the world.

You can read the other two blogs here:

http://www.jenhatmaker.com/blog/2012/03/26/dear-trayvons-mom

http://www.casselljourneytoafrica.blogspot.com/

Easter 2012

When Jaxon was a baby, my mom started having an annual Egg Hunt at her house on Easter weekend. It has grown so much over the past 8 years. There are new faces each year and those that have been in previous years but had to miss, are always sad! My parents and their friend Kathy from Arizona do SUCH a wonderful job of getting everything prepared for this big event! They have lots of cupcakes, a craft for the kids, an Easter bunny for pictures, an Easter story (Resurrection Eggs this year), not to mention a beautiful yard!

Here's the woman behind the event! She just makes me do all her yelling....I have NO idea why ;)

Here's some of the guests waiting for the "GO!"

The Duke fam with the Easter Bunny...yes, we're all here....that means Daddy-O is....yep, you got it!

These babies were NOT happy with us one bit! If we had a video to see how fast Bo got away from him....hi-lar-i-ous!

Here we are today after church. The sermon was wonderful....always is! I just love Easter Sunday!

A weekend like no other!

A weekend away! An adult weekend away. The kids were taken care of. Nana and Poppi were on duty from Thursday night till Sunday whenever we got home! It was gonna be FUN! It was gonna be relaxing. It was going to be.......(insert record scratching and nice music halting.....)


Here's Leslie and I....shopping.


Here's Chris, myself, Leslie and Luke with our toes in the sand.
That is...until Tuesday evening when a stomach bug (and ear infection) entered my home. Not just any stomach bug. A vicious, doesn'twannaleave, gonnagetyouall stomach bug. 2:30am Wednesday morning, it got Joss. Poor baby! I have never seen a baby so young throw up like that. 2:30 Wednesday afternoon, it gets Jax. This child is just like his mama. HATES to throw up. He was miserable. We think that's it. Recovery mode begins. Beach trip salvaged. Until 3:00 am Thursday morning. Daddy-O is hit. I guess adults are worse. Their poor old muscles can't take the convulsing. He needs a little more recovery time. He tries. Oh how he tries to be ok for the beach. But to no avail. We cancel the trip. We decide to spend time with the besties here. We can still have fun, right. Yep, that is until 2:30 am Saturday morning. Camron is hit. This child amazes me. He throws up, then smiles, then throws up some more. At this point I know it's only a matter of time until poor Caden goes down. Last night, around 7ish, it gets to him. He is just a mess. Up every hour last night. Everyone wakes up seemingly ok today. Camron even takes a few bites of oatmeal. Unfortunately we saw it again. I am praying we are on the road to recovery. It is so hard to see your babies so sick. I am praying if this bug gets to me, I can fight it off quickly. So here are some real pictures of my actual weekend, which yes, has been a weekend like no other!


I have used these so much my hands are dry. They have been my best friend this weekend!


My poor Cam-Cam. The bug has taken him down the longest. Bless his heart!


Sweet baby Joss. She slept most of the day Wednesday and Thursday. She.was.pitiful

With all this said, I have to say, my first instinct on Friday when I realized we weren't going to make it to the beach was "Man, that devil is really doing everything he can to keep me here and keep me from this wonderful weekend we had planned." (Notice the ME, ME, ME....yikes) Only to realize Saturday morning that it wasn't the devil interfering in my plans at all. It was my Good Lord, keeping me here to care for my babies. He knew they would need me. He knew I needed to be home with them to wipe their tears, rub their backs while they threw up, and rub their hurt bellies while they tried to sleep.
Ironic that I was thinking that I was going to get a few full nights of uninterrupted sleep this weekend and instead I have probably slept less than I did when Joss first came home! ALL THINGS JOY, right?!?!
So I'll leave you with a quote from the brilliant Ann Voskamp:
"Humbly let go. Let go of trying to do, let go of trying to control, let go of my own way, let go of my own fears. Let God blow His wind, His trials, oxygen for joy's fire. Leave the hand open and be. Be at peace. Bend the knee and be small and let God give what God chooses to give because He only gives love and whisper a surprised thanks. This is the fuel for joy's flame. Fullness of joy is discovered only in the emptying of will."

thinking....

Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from Him. Psalm 127:3 (NLT)

I love my children. No, I mean, I L-O-V-E, want to squeeze them till their heads pop off, love them. The Lord has been confirming our decision for me to be home with them and teach them on many occasions lately. I love seeing God's fingerprints in our daily life regarding decisions we have made.
We don't have extra money. Many of the extras our children experience, I won't lie, are thanks to a very generous Nana and Poppi. I am ok with that. I love my time with my kids and thank God every day that I am able to be here with them.
I know there are some people who want and need to work for their family but we have chosen this life for our family and we are extremely happy with it!

I have fallen off the face of the blogging world...

Not really sure why. I feel like so much has been going on. All around me. Within me. I can't really put it into words quite yet.

For now, here are some pictures!

Daddy-O and Joss being silly!

Such a good student!

Nana took the kids to the science center while I worked the consignment sale! Here are the boys with Tom!

The boys got a build-a-bear car from the sale. As you can see, Joss likes it!

Loving on Grandma Ruth!