At 12:16 am, this morning, we welcomed our 4th son into this world. He weighed 3lbs 8oz. and was 16in long. He was beautiful. Perfect in every way. He never took a breath, he never cried. But you see, his life was already better than mine and better than yours. He was already with Jesus. For reasons that I cannot even begin to fathom right now, our son was taken from us much much sooner than I ever dreamed. I don't know why this happened. I honestly can make no sense of it what so ever. But I trust completely, fully, and whole heartedly that there IS a reason. One day I will know. One day, that reason will be made clear to me. One day.
Friends, I thank you so much for the calls, emails, texts, facebook messages, etc. It means so much to our family. I cannot put in to words the pain I am feeling right now. If it were physically possible for a heart to be broken, mine would be. It will take time, lots of it I'm sure.
At this point, we are not sure if there is a medical reason this happened. We are planning a small grave side service for our family. I can't even really wrap my mind around that right now. I am 30 years old and I have to plan my babies funeral arrangements.
I know many of you have tried to call. I really can't talk right now. Please know I love you and I covet your prayers but I can't talk about it. It just hurts too badly right now. Please continue to pray for our family. Pray that Chris and I are able to deal with this in the best way we know how. Pray our boys can make sense of this the best way their little minds are able.
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23 comments:
Praying! Love you guys!
I am praying with out ceasing. I can't get you off my mind, and I know that is exactly what God wants from me right now! Sending my love!
I am praying without ceasing for you and your family. Feel Jesus holding you in his arms. He NEVER leaves us or Forsakes us. Your sister in Christ, Janet
"...Every tear I've cried
You hold in your hand
You never left my side
and though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm"
I'm Janet's sister and I am praying for your family and your broken heart!
Jordan must have been SUPER special to be with Jesus already!!!!
I cannot wait until we all are rejoicing with our Lord and Savior together in the Promise Land!
What an amazing woman, wife, mommy, and child of God you are!!! Jordan was one blessed baby to have such an awesome Mommy taking care of him for the past 30 weeks! You inspire and encourage your friends...more than that you ooze grace that comes for God alone!!! I LOVE YOU!
We love you guys so much and will be praying continually for peace and strength. No words can comfort you completely but knowing that our God will never leave us nor forsake us can get us thru the worst of storms. Todd and I (and my mom, dad, and extended family) are praying for you. Let us know if we can do anything for you. Anything at all! Hugs! love you, Hana
Chris and Jen,
We are so sorry to hear about your loss...please know that we are praying for you across the miles.
In Him Alone,
Glenn & Jodi Claycomb
Jenn,
Words cannot express how heartbroken I am for you. Please remember how much I love you and will do ANYTHING to help you. Obviously, I am thinking about you constantly and praying.
Love, JoJo
So perfectly said my sweet friend. Loving you and praying for strength and courage to face each minute of the day.
Jenn, you are in my thoughts and heart. Praying for you!
Jenn-I haven't known you that long, but I love you. My heart is breaking for you, and I am praying incessantly for your whole family. How blessed you are to know you have the Lord to give you strength, comfort, peace, and hope. It's amazing to know that the creator of our universe is crying all those tears right along with you.
Prayers and hugs. Your angel Jordan is in heaven watching over you right now. Love and prayers for your family.
Praying for your family~
Jen, our family is praying for you.
I found your blog through Leslie Phillips. I am so very sorry for your loss. Please know you have countless numbers of strangers lifting you up in prayer.
I know you do not even know where to start, and probably aren't even ready to begin the healing process. But Angie Smith (her blog is called Bring the Rain) has just this week come out with a book on the loss of her daughter Audrey Caroline. I have heard it is very powerful.
praying for your family as you grieve this precious little loss.
I just came over from Hana's blog and my heart breaks for you, dear one. My daughter was also born still last October. Continue to lean on Him. He will get you through and carry you when you can't take another step.
I will be a listening ear, if you ever need one. Right now I will lift you and your precious family up to our Lord.
Praying for you,
Karen
Your faith in our amazing God and His sovereign plan is beautiful! I'm praying for God to continue revealing Himself through you and your family as you heal and celebrate your sweet littlest son being home with Christ!
I heard this unfortunate news from Hana at Mom Tog Diaries and my heart goes out to you. I am sending my heart felt prayers at this time!
CHRIS AND JEN SO SORRY TO HEAR ABOUT LITTLE JORDAN. TROY AND I KNOW WHAT YOU ARE GOING THROUGH. WE LOST OUR DAUGHTER DALLAS ALMOST 9 YRS AGO WHEN SHE WAS 26 DAYS OLD. WE WILL BE PRAYING AND SENDING MUCH LOVE TO YOUR SWEET FAMILY. 3 THINGS THAT WILL HELP YOU THROUGH THIS ALL... GOD, YOUR BOYS AND KNOWING BABY JORDAN IS HEALTHY NOW AND YOU WILL SEE IN HEAVEN SOON. PLEASE LET US KNOW IF YOU NEED ANYTHING.
LOVE YA,
REBECCA MILLER
I am praying for you, your baby, and your family.
;)Alyssa
(new blogger)
Praying for you all. So very sorry for your loss.
There are times when words simply fail...now is that time. I grieve with you over the loss of your precious son, your dreams and the moment you will never have. You are in my prayers.
I am Leslie Phillips' sister and she has asked me to pray for you guys. I cannot fathom your pain in these heartbreaking moments, but I do know our God. I will beseech Him to meet you so intimately with His balm of healing. Press deep into Him. He alone is our hope.
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