The boys were EXTREMELY surprised. We told them we were going to Ikea for the day. Which was not a lie, we did go to Ikea but just for a quick trip :). Our first problem came Sunday morning when Jaxon, who was aware of the anniversary, decided he needed to stay at Nana's with his little sister. He wanted to be with her and he didn't want to leave her for a silly trip to Ikea. After some coaxing, he decided he would come along with us. We had a wonderful 2 days there (although we ALL missed Jossalyn TREMENDOUSLY).
We came home and went to Jordan's grave where the boys wanted to release balloons. Everyone wrote a message on a balloon and we let them go. It was a peaceful moment we all enjoyed. It amazes me beyond words when I think how far we have all come since last year. So much has changed. It's all so bittersweet. You go through something like losing a child and you feel like you will be sad forever. You feel like you will never experience happiness again. You feel like you will never be the same. The only true statement here is that you will never be the same. I have changed in more ways than I ever imagined and I am so grateful for those changes. The Lord has taught me so much about me, about others, about life. Praise Him!
I still miss Jordan like crazy. How can I not. He is my son. But I can rest in the fact that we will one day be reunited in a glorious heaven.
Wounds will heal
Scars will remain
Gentle reminders
Of the pain
Joy now fills those
Wounds so deep
Lessons from our Lord
We'll continue to reap
7 comments:
Tears and love! Whenever I read about your loss the love and the resoration God has granted you is so evident. I still have tears for my little one I lost. You encourage me lady!!
Sending my prayers and thoughts to your family. Jordan is pretty special to be with Jesus already!
love you! love your family! I cannot imagine your pain, but I have seen the strength the only God could give you--and your family! You are always in my thoughts and prayers...
over the past few weeks i have listened to john mayer's song "the heart of life" over and over. every time i have heard it, i think of you, your family, and all that has happened over the past year.
I hate to see you cry
Lying there in that position
There's things you need to hear
So turn off your tears and listen
Pain throws your heart to the ground
Love turns the whole thing around
No, it won't all go the way it should
But I know the heart of life is good
You know it's nothing new
Bad news never had good timing
Then the circle of your friends
Will defend the silver lining
Pain throws your heart to the ground
Love turns the whole thing around
No, it won't all go the way it should
But I know the heart of life is good
if you have not heard it, you should listen to it, as much as it makes me tear up, it makes me smile!
sending love to you!
This is so sweet! XoXo
Our God is an awesome God
He reigns from heaven above
With wisdom, power and love
our God is an awesome God
love ya...
Love you!!! Thanks for sharing your heart. So glad you all had a good time at the Lodge!
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